I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
