We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
