Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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