That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize
