yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Randomize
