"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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