Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
