There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
