To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
