What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
