I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I think my moral compass just broke
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
