So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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