Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I have peed in a lot of sinks
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
