also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I could make wine with my vomit
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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