went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
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