When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
