i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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