She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Randomize
