If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
