"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
In other news, I just burned my penis
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
