it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
As shirtless as possible
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
