last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
