Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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