vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
