Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
