Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
