I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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