Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
