why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
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