Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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