plz talk dirty to me
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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