there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
