So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
