ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
