WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
