HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Randomize
