New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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