PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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