You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
He had one of those small greek statue penises
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
