Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
