I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
