Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
