i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize