john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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