He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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