I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Randomize
