Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
