So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Randomize
