Everything about him screamed your future.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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