the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
