Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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